Holidays are supposed to be a time to look forward to and, initially, the holidays sound like a time of relaxation and quality family time. Unfortunately, if you look closer, there are many things that can contribute to feelings of isolation, loneliness, and stress. You may not be thrilled about every guest that comes to your holiday dinner table, but there could be some other unwanted guests in attendance, like stress, anxiety, and depression. When these feelings creep up, it can be difficult to put on a happy face and get into the holiday spirit. If you aren’t feeling “merry and bright” this holiday season, you should know you are not alone.
Why We Get Depressed During the Holidays
What makes one person feel sad or depressed may not affect another person. Financial stressors, family obligations, social gatherings, and unrealistic expectations surrounding the holidays are difficult to cope with. People who experience major depressive disorder may find this time particularly hard, especially if those individuals also have a seasonal pattern alongside major depressive disorder. Seasonal affective disorder can affect up to 20% of people, especially young adults, during the winter months. The further north you live increases your chances of suffering from SAD.
The Holidays and the Pandemic
Aside from normal stressors, the pandemic can bring on different feelings of depression, such as social isolation. Generally, a good way to avoid depressive symptoms is social interaction, however, this is especially difficult during a global pandemic. It is easy to feel emotionally disconnected during this time given the fact that the holidays look different than they ever have in our lifetimes. When you have major depressive disorder, the simplest things can feel difficult, like brushing your teeth or taking a shower. Now, without plans to attend, and no holiday cheer distractions, more people could be affected.
The Holidays and Grief
People typically spend the holidays with the people they love the most. If those people have passed on, it can bring unexpected feelings of emptiness or grief. All of the general festivities of holidays can bring back up feelings of loss. As painful as experiencing a loss the first time around was, it can be even more difficult during the holidays. Unfortunately, grief is a part of the healing process. Experiencing the pain can be better in the long-term, but when you’re in the moment it’s uncomfortable, and having cheery people in the next room just adds to feelings of isolation.
Coping Mechanisms
The good news is, there are lots of effective coping mechanisms that can help you during these difficult times. The most important thing to do is allow yourself to feel your feelings, and be willing to speak about what you’re going through. If you are at an event where you aren’t comfortable, don’t be afraid to let people know that you aren’t up for it. Being vulnerable and opening up to people about what you’re struggling with isn’t always easy, especially during the holidays, but it is important in combating depression. Lastly, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Looking for support groups or contacting a professional could be your best bet.
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